shoot me

its been a couple of weeks since i began this do-it-yourself project at benhil. it’s been fun though. i found out that i really really like tearing things apart. now that leaves the question of how to assemble … hmm

the broken hammer was a nice start. too excited maybe? or this hidden male hormone in me? i always joke to close friends that im a gay trapped in female’s body. eh? say that again????&^%&%^$%. nah.. im not that twisted. im just craving for attention. what a louzy attention grabber .. failed even.

not trying to say anything in this blog entry. just wish to type something.

okay okay id say it.  i have something to shout really really loud. IM ADDICTED TO INTERNET!!!

there .. now please someone suggest some cures …

and you think its not bad? how about adding to that some emotional imbalance and disability to look at something beyond this minute…

sigh.. i guess im a bit twisted

Uncategorized | Comment (0)

loving for the sheer sake of it

dari film: Les Chansons D’Amor

aslinya dalam bahasa Perancis. i wish i speak the language ..

Have you ever loved

For the sheer sake of it

Have you ever taken

A  bite of the aple

For the taste of the fruit

Its sweetness and its zest

Have you ever lost your way

Yes i’ve already loved

For the sheer sake of it

But the apple was hard

And i cracked a tooth

Those uripe passions

Those indigestible love

Often makes me feell sick

But a true love that lasts

Leaves lovers exhausted

And their overripe kisses

Rot on our tongues

But the fleeting love affairs

Know such futile fevers

And their kisses so green

Chafe against our lips

For if you wish to love

For the sheer sake of it

The worm in the apple

Can slip between our teeth

It eats aways at our heart

Your brain and all the rest

Slowly bleeding us dry

But when we dare to love

For the sheer sakeof it

This worm the apple

That slips in

Can make our heart fragrant

Our brain too and leave us

Its perfume inside us

But fleeting love affairs

See such futile efforts

Their passing caresses

Can wear out our bodies

But a true love that lasts

Makes the lovers less fine

Often the test of time

Uncategorized | Comment (0)

tensed .. and stressed out

i can easily name a dozen of friends i know who never seem to make ‘mistakes’ in life. surely they have their complaints on things, yet im very sure when we chat, they will end up being grateful for the countless blessings they have ..

well im not complaining about mine actually. my life has been so blessed with most loving persons .. my mum who never run out of patience and prayers for this ‘weird’ daughter of hers, my ‘heroic’ dad, my adorable daughter … close relatives and super duper wonderful close friends ..

these people have always treated me with tenderness and most loving care …

i studied in a University although i didnt finish .. (lotsa excuses), and i have met people from various nationality throughout my working experience..

never do i recall having any traumatic experience in life that i can use as my excuse for my occasional compulsive attitude that most often brought me into trouble ..

so this is all about me wondering why i’m geting myself into trouble easily .. thus making continuous mistakes in life. why oh why ..

i have been very lucky to get out of most trouble i made .. yet the bad track record is unbareable when trying to contemplate .. so frustrating when you cannot come up with slightest little thing that would make you proud of yourself ..

so what do i do then? .. forget all and start over? hope to meet new people who never crossed my path and never had clue of my past? .. should i brave myself and accept whoever i am ? that seem to be the only choise ..

why life seems easier for some people while it seems rather curvy to others?

is it part of the mystery in life that one woud ask to him/herself? and thus spending his/her entire life looking for the asnwer?

Uncategorized | Comment (1)

Lembata the whaling island

Lembata island of East Nusa Tenggara, Indonesia is home to traditional sea hunters. 

The villages of Lamalerap and Solor are the ony two spots in indonesia and its surrounding continents where traditional whale hunting still exist and allowed. The Whaling Convention, of which Indonesia is not a member, had consented that this activity is allowed for the sole purpose of the lembatans to hunt is pure consumption.

The whaling season usually occurs during the dry period called mussi leffa between May till September. This is when the big games of the sea passing the island by on their migrating route. To welcome the promising season, people of Lamalerap conduct rituals in churches, bringing flowers and candles to pay respect for the dead, members of the clans who died on their brave excursion in their efforts bringing home the family’s bread and butter from the sea. At the sea shore, domesticated animals such as goats and chickens are sacrificed, their blood splattered on certain areas of the pledang boat for good luck. The first pledang was set off as a symbolic gesture to commence the season. Within the next days, watchers stay alert at the shore for the familiar sights signaling the passing of the preys. Koteklema (Whales) most naturally travel in groups of five and when they are in sights, sometimes preceeded by this particular rolls of clouds that the natives indicates as the whale cloud. The water spout from the back of whales upon them breathing out can also be witnessed from a far distant as a siren for the whole village members to quickly get up and go

Upon spotting these signs, the watchers quickly shout “baleo .. baleo.. baleo…” which will be promptly responded by the ever ready matroses to quickly jump on to their own clan’s pledang and raise the sail. There should be at least one Lamafa in the Pledang and he would have a Berung Alep to assist him conquer the whale. Occasionally they would invite travelers / adventurers who happens to be there for a boat ride. Money to be collected from them upon returning to shore, more when they bring back whale or catch.

Their women, are in similar frantic and getting meals ready in plastic and tin containers wrapped in cloth, daun lontar attached to each package baring the name of the owner.

The matroses row to the vast ocean getting close to the whale. The boats would cut the serene path of the whales, and encircle them to get closer look, watching intensely and scrutinizing the game’s most vulnerable spot. Seemingy no other activities are occuring on the boat other than the nerve wreking quietness as the Lamafa getting his aim ready at the whale. Attitude is foremost important to determine end’s result. Ill saying, jokes would simply bring bad luck to the whole task, community, and village as this would drastically reduce the success rate of the year’s harvest A creepy silence swept the air and the people on them. This is their life at stake. Everyone is alert and discerning on their own specific task.

The lowered sails can be clearly visible from the shore and mountains where wives, daughters, sisters and relatives of matroses would wait expectantly upon their catch.

“Is the fish ours?” yelled the Lamafa. As the rest of the crew on the boat replied to confirm the statement, he then plunge deep into the water, aiming the tempuling (iron made sharp object with bambbo handle attached with a long rope) that he places high above his head to that particular spot. A deadly stuck on the koteklema’s body.

The whale, can reach fro 15 to 20 meters long and weigh up to 5 tons in each meter, would drag the boat miles away. Often the bulky animal dives deep under bringing down the whole hunting group and sometimes it would flip the boat. Many have dissappear during the whale hunting trip. The community keeps every single loss of the soul, on detailed occasion on record since the beginning of this century

As blood gushed out from the wound, the sea become a mix of water and blood, sometimes blood would spurt to the sea surface from the gash. The atmostphere is just unbearable for foreign souls to the island and even perhaps for the Lamafa and the Matroses as one could never be too familiar with the sound of death. The process could take hours and hours, till the whale runnning out of blood and exhausted. Ropes are entangled around the victim keeping it very close to the pledang giving opportunity for the very ready Lamafa to strike again, at the most vital spot, to end the mysery. One last final cut at the belly would bring a loud cry from the quarry, killing the mammal.

This is not over. Yet the catch has been defeated. Some would smoke cigarrette and begin to eat, releasing the tension and stress they endure during the long tiring and stressful hours of hunting.

Depending on the wind that push the to shore, the boat and the catch would soon reach home. When sun has already set, then they must find nearest shore to halt. Heading home at the earliest hour in the next day.

On the shore, awating the return of their brave matroses and lamafas, families often slept at the beach making a shelter out of the pledang’s roofed storage. Torches lit creating a festive atmosphere for the successful journey their clan member had carried out.

As the whale reach the land, the long triumph tiring task begins. Men carrying duri (sharp blade 20-30 cm longwith bamboo handle) disecting the animals in slices .. making long rectangular piece of whitish fattish load of 1-2 meter of meat. 5 to 8 men have to drag the meat to the beach and hand it over to the women and males who did not participate in the hunting.

People from nearby villages and up mountains have witnessed the hunting from the distance and have expectantly bringing goods to be traded with fresh meats as they haven’t been too patient to wait for the meat to be dried and brought to them on the regular swap market.

The smell of blood and stink would linger for days, and these too will also followed by sporadic fever among the men as they have been working hard under the fierce sun for days.

Yet, the blood, sweat, lost lives of both the hunters and koteklemas are the fuel to the local economy. The battery that keeps their community alive and thrive, making it possible for the villagers to finance their kids education in the foreign lands, to keep them well fed for months and even years … in the conservative economic system of Lembata.

(Bondet- From various sources. Photos: Nikolaus Nara)

Uncategorized | Comment (0)

.. finding your path, without wasting time

Bertolak dari tingginya angka pengangguran di Indononesia, serta berbagai situasi ekonomi yang tidak nampak terlalu menggembirakan belakangan ini, maka timbul pemikiran mengenai langkah strategis yang seharusnya dimulai oleh insan warga negara Indonesia sejak dini sebagai antisipasi masa depan.

Dalam majalah Kosmopolitan edisi awal tahun 2008, terpapar data bahwa sekitar 80% karyawan merasa salah memilih karir. Kaget? Atau malah merasa menjadi bagian dari kelompok 80% tersebut? Well, you’re not alone. Iya lah ya. 80% gitu. Itu sudah mayoritas namanya. Bisa bikin partai dan pasti menang pemilu!. Sahabat saya, teman sebangku di SMA, beberapa waktu berselang sempat mampir ke kantor seusai jam kerja dan kami bicara ngalor-ngidul. Di akhir pembicaraan, kami berdua merasa bahwa diusia kami yang 30+ (iya deh, udah 35+ sebenernya) kami merasa bahwa kami belum menemukan “dream job”. Kami merasa pekerjaan yang kami lakukan semata-mata hanya mengikuti jalan yang ada didepan kami, tanpa ada rencana sebelumnya dan tanpa ada rasa “itu”. (kita ngomongin karir apa pacar si?) Gila. Di umur 35 meennn!!!! (ekspresi kecewa separo kaget)

Layaknya melompat naik keatas kereta penumpang jadul kelas ekonomi yang kebetulan sedang melintas dihadapan kita tanpa mengetahui arah tujuan, serta menjalani saja pengalaman serta pemandangan yang ada diatas kereta. Termasuk melirik penumpang lain yang kebetulan ‘nyaman’ dilihat, membeli makanan kecil atau minuman dingin, menikmati lagu-lagu romantis patah hati sang pengamen jalanan, membiarkan ceramah rohani para prajurit pembangunan masjid masuk kuping kanan keluar kuping kiri, menikmati pemandangan di luar dan mengamati kejadian aneh-aneh diluar jendela, mencuri baca ‘headlines’ koran-koran yang diacung-acungkan penjual koran .Semua dinikmati dan juga disumpah-serapahi. Semua terjadi tanpa rencana, tanpa gambaran akan tujuan perjalanan.  Tidak bersyukurkah kami?

Tidak berani kami bilang bahwa kami tidak mensyukuri. Namun, akan lain ‘nilai’ kehidupan yang kami jalani ini, bila dijalani dengan penuh ‘awareness’ dan dengan ‘enjoyment’ akan pencapaian yang telah kami raih.

Kembali ke paragraf awal tulisan ini, ternyata ada beberapa alumnus SMA 48 yang memiliki kesepahaman akan pentingnya merencanakan masa depan secara taktis. Sayangnya, tidak semua dari kita saat masih duduk di bangku SMA menyadari pilihan-pilihan yang tersedia bagi kita setelah lulus SMA. Pilihan-piihan tersebut, yang akan sangat menentukan dalam proses penemuan jati diri kita sepuluh – dua puluh tahun kedepan selepas SMA!.

Kebanyakan anak SMA ingin melanjutkan sekolah. Kemana? Ya tentunya mengambil jurusan strategis dong. Jurusan yang menjamin masa depan. Tapikan nggak semua anak SMA mampu kuliah kedokteran atau ekonomi? Baik dari segi intelektual dan finansial. Lagi pula, memangnya kalau sudah kuliah di kedokteran atau ekonomi akan menjamin masa depan sebagai Dokter dan Manajer yang sukses? Sepertinya belum tentu juga.. Trus apa dong yang bisa bikin seseorang itu sukses dan berhasil?

Tentu parameternya banyak. Tapi entah kenapa ya beberapa alumnus yang tadi saya sebutkan diawal , sama-sama berpendapat bahwa kesuksesan itu bisa diukur dari tingkat ‘enjoyment’ dalam menjalani pekerjaan kita. Enjoyment tadi bisa dicapai bila kita melakukan pekerjaan yang kita sukai kan? Artinya, sejak awal kita sudah men-set apa sih yang jadi minat dan bakat kita masing-masing sehingga secara strategis dan taktis, kita sudah mengatur langkah kita sejak lulus SMA agar bisa menjadikan hal-hal yang menyenangkan tadi menjadi suatu profesi yang memadai secara finansial. Kan nggak semua dari kita punya takdir menyenangkan tinggal melanjutkan bisnis orang tua tokh?

Parameter ini lah yang menjadi dasar pemikiran penyelenggaraan Career Day di SMA Negeri 48 yang diselenggarakan asosiasi alumni bagi adik-adiknya, murid-murid di SMAN 48.

Rencananya, acara ini akan menjadi salah satu program reguler. Bulan ini, para pembicara yang akan sharing pengalaman serta kiat-kiat mereka dalam meraih karir mereka masing-masing adalah: Dokter Tena Purba (angkatan 88) dokter spesialis anatomi di Indonesia sekaligus dosen S2 di Universitas Atmajaya juga menjabat sebagai Ketua Museum Anatomi di Universitas yang sama. Ada juga Ali Murtado (angkatan 90) yakni Lurah terbaik se Indonesia. Selain alumni, ada pula Rene Suhardono Canoneo dari Amrophever Indonesia, yang pembicara ahi dalam hal career development. Ada juga pembicara tamu, yang menjadi inspirator bagi peserta Career Day karena karir beliau yang unik.

Pada acara perdana ini, alumni didukung sepenuhnya oleh Excelcomindo yang memberikan sponsor serta berbagai gift item. Alumni juga dibantu oleh adik-adik dari SMAN 48 dalam pelaksanaan acara. Tentunya dukungan rekan-rekan alumnus akan mejadi modal utama demi kelanjutan acara yang sangat bermanfaat bagi generasi muda secara umum, dan adik-adik kita di SMA 48 secara khusus. Mari kita lanjutkan bincang-bincang ini di forum bila ada masukan atau informasi yang ingin disampaikan demi kesuksesan acara ini berikutnya!

Reportase pelaksanaan acara akan di upload segera setelah acara selesai. Tunggu ya!

Uncategorized | Comment (0)

reunih

(June 2, 2008)

Uncategorized | Comment (0)

ngOpi ..

(May 29, 2008)

Uncategorized | Comment (0)